these are days
Alternative ending

me: texting

—ANDROID UPDATE—

me: *texts MY PHONE IS NOT SHOOTING FIRE OUT OF ITS ANUS I DEMAND ANSWERS SHIT I BETTER NOTIFY TUMBLR ABOUT THIS*

Meanwhile, everywhere else in America

me: *texting*

—ANDROID UPDATE—

me: *goes back to texting*

gtpomella:

IS GODZILLA DOING THE SAFETY DANCE?!

nope, just Pilates

wwworldwide:

im sorry. is my swag distracting you

*faints*

*faints*

kitty tries to wake his friend (x)

importantbirds:

the RARE shot a birb become hunt by a GRASS. 

importantbirds:

the RARE shot a birb become hunt by a GRASS. 

I tell my students, ‘When you get these jobs that you have been so brilliantly trained for, just remember that your real job is that if you are free, you need to free somebody else. If you have some power, then your job is to empower somebody else. This is not just a grab-bag candy game.’
Toni Morrison (via medievalpoc)
awwww-cute:

Carry me. I’m cold

awwww-cute:

Carry me. I’m cold

laughterkey:

hexabeast:

alleecat2:

the-bucky-barnes:

My cat loves when we play CAH because she squeezes into the box and becomes some kind of monorail…

Cats Against Humanity

THe biggest, blackest cat

Paging trinandtonic

unforgettabledetritus:


herculeanluxe:

jazn:

aconnormanning:

Joe Biden you slick fuck giving A+ cute tips and slipping in a message about healthcare on a pic of you looking fine as shit back in the day.

one more yr! thx uncle joe!

I can’t get over this

We’re all vice presidents in the Joe Biden Fan Club.


He puts the vice in Vice Presidency.

unforgettabledetritus:

herculeanluxe:

jazn:

aconnormanning:

Joe Biden you slick fuck giving A+ cute tips and slipping in a message about healthcare on a pic of you looking fine as shit back in the day.

one more yr! thx uncle joe!

I can’t get over this

We’re all vice presidents in the Joe Biden Fan Club.

He puts the vice in Vice Presidency.

Little known fact: Pineapples are terrified of rain.

langsettte:

pussylipgloss:

sickomobb:

don’t mind my doc marten suede grey goat hair oxfords

sorry some of my beard wax for my curly muscle man mustache is sliding down into my mouth its ok its made from real honey comb wax i dont even mind the taste

deadington

Oh that? Yesterday’s slice of pizza dangling from my beard? It’s indie.

langsettte:

pussylipgloss:

sickomobb:

don’t mind my doc marten suede grey goat hair oxfords

sorry some of my beard wax for my curly muscle man mustache is sliding down into my mouth its ok its made from real honey comb wax i dont even mind the taste

deadington

Oh that? Yesterday’s slice of pizza dangling from my beard? It’s indie.

burdenedwithgloriousassbutt:

No, you don’t understand - I literally adopted a cat I was fostering because I watched him steal half a pizza like how can you not respect that shit

burdenedwithgloriousassbutt:

No, you don’t understand - I literally adopted a cat I was fostering because I watched him steal half a pizza like how can you not respect that shit

FFFFFUUUUUUUU  - Rage Face Comics